Looking back, i felt very regretted and sorry about it.
Coming back to this topic again because recently someone was ranting about her sister for being overly attached to her boyfriend and somehow neglected everyone around her. (Very sad truth and somehow i can relates to it)
“Die die must meet every single day”
This is quoted from her message. Despite of working in a different company and the travel distance to each other’s place is really far, the couples must meet every single night after their work. From my understanding, they are currently in their third year relationship and they are still being very sticky with each other. Not only that, they will be on the phone every single night for 3 hours before sleeping. So the paranoid friend of mine was feeling knida pissed and worried because the call will last them till 2am at least where both of them got to wake up at around 7am to get themselves ready for work. My friend and her sis went into a bad fight when this topic was being brought up.
Okay, let's name my friend as A for easy reference.
My verdict: As a couples, it is fine for them on how they want to handle their relationship and priortise their time mamangaement. I believe they know themselves better than anyone out there. But personally i still feels that they should not neglect the care and concern showered by their family.
"No time given to A and family. Weekend was burnt spending time with boyfriend"
A was sharing that she felt super upset and neglected for the past 3 years as she has lack of time spending with her sister, not even one Saturday or Sunday was spare for her because both days were fully utilise by her sister for having time spend with the boyfriend.
My verdict: Hmm. Somehow i can relates a bit from here because i guess i have been through this but not as bad as A. I used to head out for shopping/window shopping with my sister during some of the weekend when i was still staying under one roof with the family. But somehow, after i have moved out from them, we don't have any time spend together on a weekend. Even there is any bonding session, our partners will be invovled in all the catch up session and etc. I felt kinda upset though because sometime i do miss hanging out with her all by ourselves without our partners around (something like sister bonding) but seem like this can't be carried out anymore? I have tried to hint or rather go straight to the point where i told her we should have an outing session on a weekend without partners around, she agreed but then, somehow this will never come true despite of our agreement. LOLOL. Can i say i have been moved out for 2 years and i don't remember i have a weekend time spend with her at all. Even my cousins/friends also noticed about it but okay, i have no say about this because everything takes 2 hands to clap la. then it will come to a point where we start commenting why we didn't ask if the party is free on certain dates to go out and etc. I did tried but seem like financial is always the reason to stop us from hanging out together even if is a window shopping. I feel if one has the heart to meet for a time spend, they will do it eventually no matter how budget we are for that month and we don't have to be the one who always ask for a meet up. One sentence to say - just plan and meet up willingly. I thought of setting this this as my resolution for 2020 but nope, because this failed badly for 2019 and to be honest i don't know how to improve on this 😂
Back to topic, so i told A nothing or anyone will stand by you forever. It's good to mingle around and to make more new friends in order to have a weekend time spend together to keep ourselves occupied. Till date, this is what i have been doing - Catching up with ex and now colleagues on a weekend if we are all free for the meet up session. To me, my life is not evolve around the husband but that doesn't mean i don't need him. We should learn to give our time to those who loves and cares for us constantly and not abusing them for nothing. On the other perception, since im staying with the husband and i'll be seeing him for the rest of my lifetime! So this where i should even learn to prioritise my time management for people around me. And this is where i also feel thankful to some of the ex colleagues and friends who has been keep me accompanied especially weekend when i was feeling down or nothing to do. hahaha
"Social media is all about him"
A screenshot her sister's IG and was sharing that her life only consist the boyfriend but not A or other people anymore. She will used to post picture of A and etc but 90% of the IG page is all about her boyfriend.
My verdict: I don't know how should i comment about this or rather i am not supposed to comment anything about it because that is not my social media page and we all have our freedom on how to handle and manage our own platform. For me, i love surfing and posting on instagram because i think that is the only social media where i could update all the photos which i wanna look back somedays and i really do scroll back some of the photos to reminicise those good gold days. So for me, i'll just post whatever that i feel like keeping it close to my heart. Posting it is not because for the sakes of likes, followers, attention or whatsoever but just for the sake for my own memories. I even do have a hard disk to back up all the photos which i have taken from my phone. You can never trust social media, they might closed down someday and pooof, there's goes all your photos uploaded on social media 😐
Ahh. And this make me realised that i have not been taking photo with the sister as well whenever there is an occasion or we were out together? Except for birthday celebrations. LOL
It was a long message by A and i hope i could share more but yeah, this is her personal issue and i should respect her privacy though i did not disclose who is she. Disclaimer, i did seek for her consent for me to share the above points at this little space and she agreed. She is also one of my reader la, so she should be reading this by end of today. hahahah
My overall thoughts on this is nobody will standby you forever. Perhaps we got to learn from the hard and be independance. Sometime i do went out alone on a weekend when everyone was occupied with their time. I do admit the feeling of eating out and going out alone is kinda weird and uneasy but just put on your earpiece and pretend you are in your own world will do. haha.
Just my few cents of nuts here! Please don't take it too personal ya! Cheers 👐
J
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